Parenting is a seesaw – sometimes you’re up (a brilliant day out with the family) and sometimes you’re down (remember what sleep felt like?). Which means there’s all sorts of universal parenting experiences that seem crazy to outsiders but make perfect sense to mums and dads. Here are the best posts that only parents can understand:
1. There’s no escape
It doesn’t matter where you hide. Your children will hunt you down, find you, and tell you they’re thirsty.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) May 1, 2019
2. Distinguishing screams is an art
“Oh, that’s just a whine-scream, which means she didn’t get what she wants. Different from the ‘there’s blood scream’, which is a much higher pitch.”
— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) April 29, 2019
-Veteran parents, remaining seated.
3. It’s hard to keep up with their standards!
My new greatest fear is getting roasted by my kids every time I enter the room wearing what I consider a hip, new outfit.
— Mommy Owl (@Mommy__Owl) April 29, 2019
4. Constantly on edge
5. Always ready to discipline
I am on a bus with a hundred second-graders who are definitely all using their outside voices, how is your Wednesday going
— Nicole Chung | @nicolechung on Bluesky (@nicolesjchung) May 1, 2019
6. Cinema trips just aren’t the same
Endgame spoiler (parent edition):
— here comes the son (@idtweetforever) May 3, 2019
Whatever part you’re the most excited to see is the part you’ll miss while taking your child to the bathroom.
7. Toys get literally everywhere
#youknowyoureaparentwhen you open your leftovers from last night and find a hot wheel embedded in your sandwich.
— Tyler Evans (@tyleredesign) December 10, 2016
8. The dreaded sass
I became a father the day my daughter was born but I didn’t become a dad until the first time she rolled her eyes at me.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) June 16, 2019
9. You get used to other genres
#youknowyoureaparentwhen the book on your bedside table is about a mole trying to find the animal who pooed on his head…
— Rain or Shine (@Rain_or_ShineUK) March 24, 2017
10. Pretending we didn’t complain as much as they did
The worst thing about being a parent is pretending I don't think homework is a scam
— Jessica Valenti (@JessicaValenti) May 29, 2019
11. They’ll never know…
Oh, you lost, your tooth? With only five minutes before bedtime? The tooth fairy must be thrilled. Absolutely thrilled. I’m sure she didn’t have anything else to do tonight. This is just so, so great.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) April 11, 2019
12. Even work isn’t an escape
#YouKnowYoureAParentWhen You have Spotify running while at work, and all of a sudden Baby Shark starts playing because your wife asked Alexa to play it for the small roommate.
— Alex Baum (@a_baum_1) January 4, 2019
13. You could write an album
You know you’re a parent when: You create a song based on a mundane daily activity to make your kid smile- and it gets stuck in your head. 🤦🏽♀️ #brushybrushbrushy #youknowyoureaparentwhen #momlife
— Kelsie Becker (@becker_kelsie) March 29, 2019
14. If only life was so simple
My vision board is just a picture of me sleeping.
— Paige Kellerman (@PaigeKellerman) January 28, 2019
15. Your parent head never switches off
#YouKnowYoureAParentWhen you can't relax and watch the beginning of #Moana because she's a toddler, unsupervised, by the ocean.
— Katie Somers (@theladykatie) March 6, 2017
What did the grape say when he was pinched? Nothing, he gave a little wine.